Sunday, January 31, 2010

Birth order trends

The Multiples and More question of the week is about birth order trends.

Multiples come in all shapes and sizes, and each is their own person. It's hard sometimes to not label them or put them in certain categories based on their attitude, temperament or how they interact. I find my self saying "the hot tempered one" when referring to Hayden or "the clingy one" when talking about Lily...and we all know Xander is "the trouble maker" LOL. The truth is they are each these things at one time or another.

Describe your childrens' personalities, in birth order. Xander- is very busy and physical, he wants to climb on everything, move everything, and push stuff over. He is very tenacious and doesn't give up on getting to something he wants. He is a bit more of a loner but does get in on some play time with his sisters, whom he steals from or tackles to the ground at any second. He loves to run around screaming wildly, and he has the best big smiles. He is not a man of many words but is a smart boy, you can see this by all the trouble he finds himself in LOL. Hayden- is a girl on the go, she is very funny and personable, our little entertainer. She smiles all the time...though her fuse is short and she will get mad in the blink of an eye and lash out. She loves to run and dance...she has happy feet. The girl never sits still, she will come up to love on you for about 10 seconds then she is off. She makes great faces and loves to make Lily laugh, she is a total goof. Lily- is a lot more mellow, she won't usually fight over things or lash out...but the little red head has a line and if you cross the line she will come at you. Most of the time she is a cuddle bug and is full of cute little grins and laughs. She is very watchful, and seems to think about things before she acts....sometimes LOL. She craves more attention from adults than her brother or sister do. The girls are both more vocal than their brother, they seem to be forming a strong little sister bond and are often playing together.

Do you think your kids personalities are related to their birth order? No, I really don't think the order they got pulled out during my C-Section has anything to do with their personalities.

Is your baby A any bolder or more dominant than B, C, D? A-Xander and B- Hayden are both very bold and dominant, C- Lily is more passive, but you can only push her so far.

Does your last-born reach milestones last as well? Lily did reach all of the gross motor skills milestones last, but she reached a number of the fine motor skills milestones first.

Are there any characteristics that you feel are somehow related to birth order? I don't think the birth order had much to do with it, I think their inherent personalities dictate who they are and how they act. Xander and Hayden were born only seconds apart and there was a mere 3 oz of weight difference, so it seems as though competition started early with them....and they are both me first kind of kids. Lily was last out by about 2 min and was 8 oz smaller than our biggest baby, she was smaller, weaker and had a rougher start...she is a bit clingy and more chill than her brother and sister.

Do you find that a lot of people like to "classify" your kids? How do you feel about it? Yes, I do think a lot
of people classify them, and to some degree that may be our fault because we do it a little ourselves. However, as the parents with unconditional love and all I haven't been too worried about it, but I think it's time to change that. I am upset a bit when others do it, they don't know the babies as well as we do and I think not only can kids grow into peoples opinions of them...for better and worse, but people can get stuck on their impressions of others as well. I would hate for Xander to be everyones 'Dennis the Menace' simply because he is an active, curious, growing little boy. Labels can hurt and stick with people...I don't want that for the trio...they all have their good points and a few challenges, just like any other kid.


Deanna said...

Great post! I definitely agree with what you said about labels...I am always telling my family not to label our kids, they may very well grow into them! : )

TripMomma said...

Thanks :) I think it's time for me to get more proactive in stopping the labels, it's not a good thing. Sounds like you are already doing a good job of that!

Sadia said...

Your three are adorable!!

I like your take on labeling. Now if only people would use my daughters' names (preferably the right one for the right child) instead of using "twins" as a cop-out, I'd be satisfied.

I do understand that it's harder with identicals, but mine don't look a whole lot alike, and they each have their own style. (Melody wears her hair long and likes elaborate "dos", while Jessie is more no-fuss.)

TripMomma said...

Yes Sadia you are so right, but I too am guilty of this with my own, I try not to do it often but at time I say "the triplets" LOL
I went by your blog, your girls are precious and I loved reading about them and your family :)